Fitting it all in

Since Sunday, after I dragged myself out to meet up with the Portland Metro Mocha Moms (moms of color, not a coffee group), I have been thinking a lot about the best way to raise my kids and set them up for success.

I am the first to admit that my kids are not likely to end up as a statistic. Kids raised in a two-parent household where both parents are college educated are rarely the ones dismal statistics are referring to. BUT it's not like that's a hard-and-fast rule. So naturally I worry about doing the best things for them. That's a universal momma thing I think.

I worry about who they will date. More specifically I worry about the parents' reaction when some little white girl brings my little black boy home as her boyfriend. Because really we live in Oregon and have no plans to move so that's likely going to be the reality. I posted a picture of Aliyah "tanning" recently, so yeah it's fair to say I worry about her self-esteem when she sees very few people who look like her.

Oh but wait the topic of this post was "Fitting it all in" not "What LaRonda Worries About." So back on topic. With all this going on in my mind, I start thinking about how to give my kids the best chance of success. Academically that has meant homework even when none is assigned. It has meant summer reading programs and workbooks, etc. And I think I have a pretty good handle on the supplemental education in that respect.

But then my friend Michelle mentioned that she does supplemental black history work with her children, too. And I thought, "Oh man! I should be doing that, too." But then I started to panic trying to think about how to fit that into what we're doing already.

I am having a hard time thinking through the balance between social time/play time, supplemental education, and extracurricular activities. There are only so many hours in a day after all. And I don't want to overschedule the kids or have kids activities totally take over our family time. So I guess what I'm looking for are suggestions for fitting it all in.

TMI: No longer a breeder

I am officially no longer a breeder. The three kids I have are the only three who will come from my womb. I thought I'd get cold feet. I thought I'd be sad. But I'm not.

I am mainly relieved. No more trying to remember if I took my BC pill. Because as bad as my memory is, I'm surprised we only have three kids.

Big Brother E was sadder than I am. He was hoping for a brother. He doesn't quite grasp that he could have ended up with three sisters!

So I'm sitting here, relaxing with an ice pack on my belly waiting to feel even a little sad. I think I'll be waiting for a while.

Missing work? How odd!

I was just thinking this morning that I miss having a job. Kinda.

Stay-at-home mom is a job. I know; you don't have to remind me. I enjoy parenting for the most part. I tolerate housework. I belong to moms' groups so I see my "co-workers." And getting paid in hugs and kisses is great except it doesn't pay for the new boots I want to buy.

And yes, I know I have the whole business owner thing going with my book business. I absolutely love sharing Usborne books with people and meeting other parents. But let me be honest, generating business is hard work and takes motivation that I sometimes just don't have.

So that brings me to a j-o-b, like one that I leave the house and go to. One where I'm with other adults most of the day. One that pays in tender that can be used to buy hot pink cowboy boots.

I really don't want a job though. I don't want to think about before and after-school care and what to do when the kids are sick or off school. I don't want to figure out how to get the kids to their activities (even though paying for the activities would be easier). I don't want anyone expecting to see me at 8 a.m. or even 9 a.m. I don't want to deal with traffic.

I do miss the steady paycheck without me having to do the business generation to get it. I miss having work friends. I miss plopping down in someone's office for a chat. I miss happy hours and cake to celebrate everyone's life events. I miss having mad editorial skills. I even miss meetings--a little. But really I think I just miss my ASAE friends. I made some really awesome connections during my nine years there. And even though most of them aren't even there anymore, I guess I'm feeling a little nostalgic.

OK enough of that. I guess I should go do some parenting or housework or book selling.

Conversation with my 5 year old daughter

5 year old: Do you want my autograph?
Me: Are you famous?
5 year old: No.
5 year old: Do you want me to sign your shirt?
Me: Are you famous?
5 year old: No.
5 year old: What's famous? Does that mean I'm rich?
Me: Not necessarily. It means you're well known.
5 year old: I'm well known. Katie knows me.

Can I just say it's 8:40 a.m., and I haven't had my coffee yet. OMG this child is funny.

When panic attacks

I am the queen of not overdoing it, of not overscheduling, of taking it easy and staying low key. I wasn't always this way. But I have gotten to know myself better these 39 years. So it was odd to wake up in stress mode this morning with heart palpitations and a cold sweat in full effect.

I still don't know what really set me off. My first thought was that I didn't hit send on an Usborne Book order, and that it wouldn't arrive in time for Christmas gifts. As I took some deep breaths to calm myself, I realized I did see an order confirmation come through. But to reassure myself, I checked my shipping tracker. Cool; order is set to arrive tomorrow. Worries over, right? Not quite.

Didn't Deb and Lee-Ann ask me to send some announcements out for PTA stuff? Don't I have some auction calls to make? Aren't I missing a Girl Scout payment? What about Christmas gifts? Do I have everything bought and ready to wrap? Do I need to revisit the kids' lists to make sure I got at least one thing they specifically asked for? Oh yeah, my mother-in-law arrives on Tuesday, isn't it time to clear the laundry off the guestroom bed?

This isn't major stuff. It's remedied by making a list and taking it one thing at a time. So I can't really imagine that this is the cause of the current tightness in my chest. But then again maybe I'm a little more overwhelmed than I am used to. Who knows? I'm going to put on a movie and fold some more clothes.

Last thing I read

I was up until 5:30 a.m. reading this book: http://www.amazon.com/Unleashed-Spring-Chronicles-Nancy-Holder/dp/0385740980/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1323298958&sr=1-2.

Forgoing sleep to read is such a bad habit! I guess the fact that I stayed up all night to finish it gives the book a pretty good recommendation though.

It's young adult fiction targeted toward the Twilight-loving crowd. Some weird, wolfy things are going on in a small Arkansas town. Being from Arkansas, I think it's cool the book is set there.

It was a quick read. I'd be interested in reading the rest of the series. I'm kinda bummed that it's a new series because that just means I'll have to wait forever for the next book. I prefer coming into a series that's already done or close to it, so I don't have to wait!

It's not a tree trimming until someone cries

We have a pre-lit, artificial tree. You'd think it would not be hard to get it put up except for 30 minutes all I could find where plugs and not the ends to put them in. What the heck?! After many attempts at plugging and unplugging, I finally have lights on all parts of the tree. Success! It was bad there for a minute when I actually thought untangling strings of lights would be preferable. Little Miss Middle Child put the angel on top. And now I'm wondering, do we really need ornaments?

To pass the time until the hubster gets home to find the big Christmas box in the attic, the kids are supposed to be putting the train track together. We usually have the Polar Express heading around the bottom of the tree each year. Judging from the squeals in the other room and the mess of tracks all over the floor, I'm guessing they've given up on this endeavour. Maybe they're feeling the same way that I did about the lights.



Notice all the pillows on the floor? So that's what those squeals were about!



Who needs a track? I'll just go around these socks here.

And now the crying begins...it's 8:20 p.m. The track still isn't done. And a certain someone is crying because it's time for bed and no ornaments are on the tree. Three guesses who. "I don't want to go to bed! I want to watch the Polar Express and do the ornaments!" And that's how we know it's Christmas time in our house.

Happy Holidays!